what's the deal with all of this white stuff???

it's february 27th, 2015, and today it is snowing here in texas. crazy.

i have dinner cooking in the crock-pot (a recipe called, "chicken for supper"), and you can smell it throughout the house when the heat is kicked on. it smells pretty yummy.

by this time everyone knows, or at least everyone who reads this knows, that i had a job interview yesterday that i was very nervous about. the interview went fine; i was asked a series of questions that, at least seemingly, i gave good answers to. the actual interview itself only went on for about fifteen to twenty minutes. however, once the interview was over, we sat there and discussed my working with kids so much and in different facets, and then moved on to discussing photography. that went on for about thirty minutes or so. so while i don't think the interview itself went poorly, i do not think i got the job. they're still interviewing people all the way through next week, and they have a pretty wide pool to choose from. i don't know, maybe i'll be surprised and get it, but i'm not counting on it. in other words, i'm still looking.

aside from that, this week has been all over the place. with family illness, and me not being able to go to therapy at all this week due to the weather, not to mention just feeling cooped up in general, i've had a hard time staying still and finding that calm place that i can usually escape to. i want to paint, but it's below freezing outside, and even in the garage it's too cold to do anything. i guess i'm just going to have to find something else to do that will ease my mind. maybe i will go play around in photoshop for awhile. that's always fun.

well, i guess that's about all i've got for now.

oh, right. leonard nemoy died at the age of 83. that's really sad. they said he died of copd. sucks. he seemed to be a very upstanding human being, and you don't come across those very often. so r.i.p. mr. spock. you will be missed.

'til then,
-xian

april 2014???

i didn't realize how long it has been since i last posted anything on here.

well first i should say that i am doing much better. my meds finally got all sorted out, and i have a pdoc that actually cares about and listens to me. no more exploding head as of the past two months, so that's great! the only thing i really deal with now on a semi-day by day basis, is my paranoia. but that's easily managed with anxiety meds, so i really feel no threat there. i do still find myself getting down on myself for having to take so many medications just in order to keep up with the rest of the world's "normal". it sucks, but i have to do what i have to do in order to live my life to the best possible outcome.

now lately i've been reading some posts on facebook, from people i know, and from news media and politicians alike, that really have my blood boiling. i  get so angry about this because i hate it when people are misinformed, or feel the need to lecture the rest of us on how we're supposed to live and what we're supposed to believe in.

i have absolutely no qualms when it comes to freedom of speech, however i do feel that there are people out there that abuse this right to forward their own selfish agendas, or to talk down to the rest of us just in order to feel better about themselves. don't get me wrong, i fully enjoy friendly debates over why one this is the way it is, and isn't for another reason. but these people that i speak of take it too far. when it stops being a discussion, and starts being a lecture, you've at that point discounted anything the other person has said, in a way that makes it seem as though what they bring to the  table is unimportant.

i don't know, without starting to lecture myself, that's just the way i see it. why can't we just all be open for discussion instead of things being either black or white? red or blue?

just a thought.

til then,
-xian